The Flatterers

Today I was reading through messages from "interested" colleges on a college website... you know, the kind where you put in your GPA, SAT scores, and maybe an intended major or two and colleges from all over the country start selling themselves at your feet. After the PSAT as a sophomore, I admit I was rather flattered- but at this point it's just dull- I hit the delete button for about 90 percent of the messages. However, today I hit the "yes, fine, send me your massive amounts of emails" button even though I have no intention of looking further into the school. My reason? This college had a major in Turf and Turfgrass Management. So if chimney sweeping doesn't work out, I know what my follow-up career choice will be.